West Texas Mama

Recently, we welcomed a new member to the family - a nice, shiny, bouncing baby Tahoe.  The ol'Trailblazer had seen it's best days pass it by and she was ready for the pasture.  Little did I know that the new vehicle would be the source of so much contention and argument amongst our little family. The Tahoe is a big, beautiful, black vehicle, and I was thoroughly convinced she needed a name that fully represented her.  (She is most definitely a female.)  I considered the name "Sophia" after the character portrayed by Oprah Winfrey in The Color Purple.  But, then I thought about Octavia Spencer's character in "The Help":  Minny Jackson.  Minny was quite the character, and I knew immediately that my lovely Tahoe would be "Minny" from then on. Then I picked up my offspring.  Jake immediately, and very vocally, made it known that he did not like the name Minny.  He wanted to call her "Striker".  Why "Striker", I asked?  ...

Each year, El Hubbo plans and labors over The Great Brisket Smoke.  Originally, this involved a few briskets, some foil, basic spices (garlic, salt, pepper), an electric knife, some mesquite, and freezer bags.  It has evolved to now include 10 briskets, foil, foil pans, aluminum pans bought from a bakery going out of business, a full-size electric meat slicer (yes, like those you see at the meat/cheese counter in the grocery store), an almost industrial size vacuum sealer, some mesquite, a super-secret multi-spice recipe, and a full-twenty-four-hour smoke-out. Here is El Hubbo starting the fire and getting ready at 5:00 p.m. He was wondering what his crazy wife was doing with the camera.  This is him putting the briskets on the fire: The look of a man still fresh, still energetic, still convinced he can pull an all-nighter with no negative effects: I soon lost interest in taking pictures of El Hubbo as the aroma of smoking, sizzling meat started to overco...

If you have read many of my blog articles, you know my love of a coupon. Recently, I was shopping in a local store and on the end cap there was a display of large coloring pages featuring Dora and Batman. I thought this would be a good little treat for the urchins. Imagine my joy when I saw on the Dora package a coupon for $1.00 off a package of crayons. What better item to go with coloring sheets than crayons? I was certain the kids would enjoy those much more than the pens or highlighters I usually scrape up. I could hear the chants of "Best Mama Ever!" I find the crayons and toss them in my basket and finish my shopping. I was greeted in a less than enthusiastic manner by Faye, the checkout lady. Faye was an older lady and had evidently grown resentful of her employment situation. I thought I would be nice and I laid out my items on the belt and set the various coupons alongside the items. Faye rang up my goods, and when she came to my crayons she scowled ev...

Imagine my surprise when the pediatrician told me I really needed to have Jake's eyes checked.  It couldn't be that his DNA is full of mostly blind, glasses-wearing ancestors?  Being the best mom ever, I decided to wait a few months, but then the child started complaining at church that the words on the screen behind the preacher were blurry.  Since he had decided to alert the entire congregation to this fact in a very loud "stage whisper", and I could see several ladies turn and give me disapproving looks, I decided to give in and make an appointment. Prior to arriving at the doctor's office, Jake and I have several discussions about how we need to answer the doctor's questions honestly and not be silly. We arrive, and he is called back for the initial tests.  As the technician explained everything to Jake and had him start the process of going from machine to machine, Jake eagerly stuck his head up to the first one.  He was sitting in a swivel chair and ...

I work hard.  My desk is always covered with stacks of things that someone, somewhere on this campus needs me to attend to.  It's good to be needed.  However, there are times that I must ignore everyone IMing and emailing and calling and sending smoke signals to tend to the cleanliness of my workspace.  Today was that day. Fortunately, I had one good conference call, that thanks to the technological wonder that is the wireless head mic, I could multi-task and dust while listening.  This task, however, brought a few things to mind - the most important question being, "When do you know it is time to dust your office?"   The custodial representatives here will not touch your desk or bookshelves if you have anything on them.  Apparently there are liability issues.  The biggest liability issue I see is that the mountain of paperwork I huddle behind may fall like an avalanche if they breathe on it too heavy.  But, that's a topic for another day...

Jake was quietly coloring and working in his activity book during the church service recently.  This was quite an accomplishment as this child has been hauled out kicking and screaming and causing a general ruckus on more than one occasion.  El Hubbo and I were enjoying not having to issue whispered threats to the child.  The sermon was moving along nicely, and the preacher was discussing how children question everything.  He mentioned we are often tempted to reply to questions of "why?" with "Because I told you so."   My darling eldest child looked up from his book, pointed at his father and I, and said (too loudly in my opinion), "Y'all do that."  You gotta love being called out by your six year old at church. Like any parent who may or may not be guilty of the accusation, we said, "hush!" Jake returned to working in his book.  The preacher then began to talk about how our actions and choices can show what we care most about.  He used...

As you know, I was in Nashville last week.  I had a wonderful opportunity to be a fellow at the Peabody Professional Institute at Vanderbilt University.  Definitely an honor to partcipate.  Many hours in a classroom with experts in the various aspects of Higher Education Management and Leadership would not sound like fun to most people, but it was for me.  But, since I know most of my readers fall in the category that would not like to spend their time that way, I will tell you about my brushes with fame that week. I had one night "off" to myself, and I elected to go to a place called the "Loveless Cafe".   I had to drive out to the outskirts of Nashville, and as I approached the cafe I saw a cameraman filming the sign.  This was not a local news camera, but a big, fancy camera.  I parked and saw several production assistants and more cameramen floating about.  As fascinating as this was, I was  here for the food, so I marched rig...