I generally try to keep my blog relatively light-hearted. I poke fun at myself and my loved ones because I think it helps to keep perspective. Sometimes we take ourselves too seriously, and we just need a reminder that life is pretty good in the grand scheme of things.
But sometimes, life ain't fair.
What follows is an honest, heart-felt post. It will not be easy to read at times. Consider yourself warned. There are no such things as safe spaces in my world.
Few outside of an FFA or 4H program understand "why" we show livestock. Sadly, the concept of raising livestock, having any kind of inkling or understanding of how and where one's food comes from (besides the grocery store) is foreign to most, even some of you who follow this blog. (I love you anyway, but sometimes I worry about you.)
There is a fascination with our lifestyle, and I generally become the defacto ag teacher in work meetings as I explain what my kids were doing in recent pictures posted on social media. I'm married to a real-life ag teacher, so I get to see even more of what goes into an agricultural science (emphasis on science) program.
So why do we do it?
We want our children to understand they are stewards of life - they take a baby animal and they raise and care for it. They learn feeding techniques, nutrition, health and well-being. They know their animals - they name them, work with them, pet them, groom them. Every day our kids get up early, seven days a week, and they feed before school, church and everything else. They go back int he afternoons and feed again. They exercise them, clean pens, monitor for health and well-being. And, yes, they grow attached.
We want our children to understand business basics. Showing livestock, for the vast majority of us, is not a money-making proposition. But, our children get to see first hand that there are costs. They learn not to be wasteful - every ounce of feed, every bag of woodchips, medicine, the animal itself, comes with a cost. Entry fees, travel expenses, medicine, vet fees...it adds up. The revenue column is rarely as robust as the expense column, but that teaches prudence.
We want our children to understand that community and work ethic are important. Long hours in cold barns, families traveling together, setting up pens, helping load trailers - everyone does their part and supports one another. Any job worth doing is worth doing well.....and having the opportunity to work hard, over a period of months, and be able to show a judge and an arena full of people what you have produced instills confidence and pride. It's not about winning, it's about showing what you have accomplished.
We want our children to understand respect. At the Fort Worth Stock Show recently, it struck me how a barn filled with literally thousands instantly became quiet, everyone turned to the flag, hats came off, hands covered hearts, and the pledge of allegiance was said before the day began. Respect for something - a concept, really - greater than yourself is not something I have observed much of lately. Too many agendas driven by selfishness and promoted without respect or consideration for other opinions are too much in the forefront today. Respect starts with day-in, day-out individual attention to how we treat others. Parents, teachers, judges, ring attendants.....there are a lot of opportunities for kids to show respect. Shake the judges hand, say thank you and excuse me. Volunteer to help others. I don't see much of this out in the general public, but I can assure it is alive and well in the barn.
We want our children to understand that loss is bearable. We make sure they understand that there is a cycle - this relationship with this animal will have an end. This is a hard lesson. We parents fight back tears as we watch them sadly pet the pig before they go in the final show ring. We stand at the gate, waiting for them, ready with a hug and kind word while Pork Chop or Charley or Big Red is herded down the chute to the trucks. We know their little hearts are breaking, and if we are honest, so are ours. But, we also know that life will continue, we can survive grief, and we will have joy again. It's a horrible, horrible lesson, but one I am so grateful I can teach my children in this context, where I can hold them and help them through it.
Today brought a lesson that none of us were prepared to have our little ones learn. We don't want our children to learn that sometimes, life ain't fair. But, sometimes, life is determined to teach us.
Our little community of stock-showing families suffered together as we lost 11 pigs today at our ag farm. A small pack of dogs tore through our pens, killing or maiming all of the pigs. (An additional two were lost a couple weeks ago to the same pack.) These pigs were animals that our community's kids had put months into preparing to take to the San Antonio Livestock Exposition in a couple weeks, or were feeding out to eventually put food on tables. The dogs weren't hungry - they were a pack, with nothing but bloodlust on their minds. Some pigs that weren't killed, had to be humanely put down. A few are holding on as of right now, but we're just not confident they will make it.
As the parents gathered, we were all sick. We knew we had to take care of the logistics of the situation, however, none of us wanted to tell our kids what had happened. As daddies held back tears, and mamas hugged each other, we all silently started to decide what would be said and how. Our kids were robbed of hope for the upcoming show, robbed of experience, robbed of their opportunity to say goodbye to their animals, robbed of what little remuneration they do receive in return for their hard work. It just isn't fair. And there isn't a thing we can do to make it any easier. And that makes us mad. And sad. And frustrated. And we will walk through those same emotions with our kids. But then, we started to work - taking down panels, hauling off animals, putting away heat lamps, planning to come back for additional cleaning later.
And then we look around....how will we keep this from happening again? What do we need? Who do we need? How will we rally the support we need? And so, even from something so horrible, we will learn lessons....life isn't fair, but that won't keep us from trying to make it better. What our kids learn stock showing is too valuable.
I pray that our group of families will not lose heart....that we will work hard to come back next year. The fact so many came so quickly and helped to take care of the situation is a good sign - they are good people. I pray that more good people will step up and resources be put in place soon to do what needs to be done so that we can continue to teach these life lessons to our kids. Here, together, where we can help them, and each other, through those lessons.
Sometimes, life ain't fair. In fact, it is down-right hard.
But sometimes, life ain't fair.
What follows is an honest, heart-felt post. It will not be easy to read at times. Consider yourself warned. There are no such things as safe spaces in my world.
Few outside of an FFA or 4H program understand "why" we show livestock. Sadly, the concept of raising livestock, having any kind of inkling or understanding of how and where one's food comes from (besides the grocery store) is foreign to most, even some of you who follow this blog. (I love you anyway, but sometimes I worry about you.)
There is a fascination with our lifestyle, and I generally become the defacto ag teacher in work meetings as I explain what my kids were doing in recent pictures posted on social media. I'm married to a real-life ag teacher, so I get to see even more of what goes into an agricultural science (emphasis on science) program.
So why do we do it?
We want our children to understand they are stewards of life - they take a baby animal and they raise and care for it. They learn feeding techniques, nutrition, health and well-being. They know their animals - they name them, work with them, pet them, groom them. Every day our kids get up early, seven days a week, and they feed before school, church and everything else. They go back int he afternoons and feed again. They exercise them, clean pens, monitor for health and well-being. And, yes, they grow attached.
We want our children to understand business basics. Showing livestock, for the vast majority of us, is not a money-making proposition. But, our children get to see first hand that there are costs. They learn not to be wasteful - every ounce of feed, every bag of woodchips, medicine, the animal itself, comes with a cost. Entry fees, travel expenses, medicine, vet fees...it adds up. The revenue column is rarely as robust as the expense column, but that teaches prudence.
We want our children to understand that community and work ethic are important. Long hours in cold barns, families traveling together, setting up pens, helping load trailers - everyone does their part and supports one another. Any job worth doing is worth doing well.....and having the opportunity to work hard, over a period of months, and be able to show a judge and an arena full of people what you have produced instills confidence and pride. It's not about winning, it's about showing what you have accomplished.
We want our children to understand respect. At the Fort Worth Stock Show recently, it struck me how a barn filled with literally thousands instantly became quiet, everyone turned to the flag, hats came off, hands covered hearts, and the pledge of allegiance was said before the day began. Respect for something - a concept, really - greater than yourself is not something I have observed much of lately. Too many agendas driven by selfishness and promoted without respect or consideration for other opinions are too much in the forefront today. Respect starts with day-in, day-out individual attention to how we treat others. Parents, teachers, judges, ring attendants.....there are a lot of opportunities for kids to show respect. Shake the judges hand, say thank you and excuse me. Volunteer to help others. I don't see much of this out in the general public, but I can assure it is alive and well in the barn.
We want our children to understand that loss is bearable. We make sure they understand that there is a cycle - this relationship with this animal will have an end. This is a hard lesson. We parents fight back tears as we watch them sadly pet the pig before they go in the final show ring. We stand at the gate, waiting for them, ready with a hug and kind word while Pork Chop or Charley or Big Red is herded down the chute to the trucks. We know their little hearts are breaking, and if we are honest, so are ours. But, we also know that life will continue, we can survive grief, and we will have joy again. It's a horrible, horrible lesson, but one I am so grateful I can teach my children in this context, where I can hold them and help them through it.
Today brought a lesson that none of us were prepared to have our little ones learn. We don't want our children to learn that sometimes, life ain't fair. But, sometimes, life is determined to teach us.
Our little community of stock-showing families suffered together as we lost 11 pigs today at our ag farm. A small pack of dogs tore through our pens, killing or maiming all of the pigs. (An additional two were lost a couple weeks ago to the same pack.) These pigs were animals that our community's kids had put months into preparing to take to the San Antonio Livestock Exposition in a couple weeks, or were feeding out to eventually put food on tables. The dogs weren't hungry - they were a pack, with nothing but bloodlust on their minds. Some pigs that weren't killed, had to be humanely put down. A few are holding on as of right now, but we're just not confident they will make it.
As the parents gathered, we were all sick. We knew we had to take care of the logistics of the situation, however, none of us wanted to tell our kids what had happened. As daddies held back tears, and mamas hugged each other, we all silently started to decide what would be said and how. Our kids were robbed of hope for the upcoming show, robbed of experience, robbed of their opportunity to say goodbye to their animals, robbed of what little remuneration they do receive in return for their hard work. It just isn't fair. And there isn't a thing we can do to make it any easier. And that makes us mad. And sad. And frustrated. And we will walk through those same emotions with our kids. But then, we started to work - taking down panels, hauling off animals, putting away heat lamps, planning to come back for additional cleaning later.
And then we look around....how will we keep this from happening again? What do we need? Who do we need? How will we rally the support we need? And so, even from something so horrible, we will learn lessons....life isn't fair, but that won't keep us from trying to make it better. What our kids learn stock showing is too valuable.
I pray that our group of families will not lose heart....that we will work hard to come back next year. The fact so many came so quickly and helped to take care of the situation is a good sign - they are good people. I pray that more good people will step up and resources be put in place soon to do what needs to be done so that we can continue to teach these life lessons to our kids. Here, together, where we can help them, and each other, through those lessons.
Sometimes, life ain't fair. In fact, it is down-right hard.
I am so very sorry! Life really is not fair sometimes. My grandson's lost one of their best pigs unexpectedly this year. I hope that things come together for all of you. Adding my prayers to all of the others!
ReplyDeleteThank you!
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