Lady Luck is a fickle woman. You know that you are being set up and cannot count on her to help you, but you play her game anyway. And, then, once you are in the midst of it, you realize once again that you will lose.
I told Jake he could only ride three rides. Of course, being the child that negotiates for EVERYTHING, he offered two rides and one game. I accepted the deal I would later realize was more Faustian in nature than I could have predicted. Finishing his two rides, he made a bee-line for the carney game.....toss a ping pong ball in a bowl of water and win a gold fish. No way can he win that, I thought, and I won't get suckered into the "upgrade" scam for nasty, cheap stuffed animals.
Emma and I hustled to keep up. The carney saw us coming. I could see the glint in her eyes from 20 paces. "How much?" I asked. "One dollar for three, 10 for $3", she replied. I hand over $2 and tell her three balls for each kid. Emma, while enthusiastic, is less than accurate in her aim. I chased the ping pong balls down the fairway and returned to the booth, gloating secretly that my plan to NOT go home with a fish was working.
Jake warmed up for his turn. He pulled his arm back, fired it forward....and the ball bounced between the bowls and to the floor. Whew, one down. He took his second ball, started his windup, and the ball hit the bowl but careened off the water and bounced to the floor. YES! Two down. I look at my son, and I see determination cross his face. With intense concentration, he took his third and final ball and let it fly with all he was worth. It glanced off the side of a bowl, and I knew we were in the clear!
Quite pleased with myself, I look down at my two adoring children.....big mistake. As their eyes welled up, and their lips started to quiver, I steeled myself for what I knew would be the counter-maneuver. "One more, please, mama?? Please???" I tried to resist, really, I did. But I failed. And, I was feeling lucky. "Ok, but this is it...we go home after this!" I pass over two more dollars. Six ping pong balls were passed back.
Emma quickly went through her three. YES, half-way home! Jake grabs his, and the first two follow suit in to no-man's land. He takes his third ball and as if in slow-motion, I watch it sail up, up, and land gently right on top of a bowl. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Jake jumps for joy. The Devils' minion, I mean carney, laughs evilly as she hands me the bag with the fish. Jake announces to the crowd that he is naming the fish Nemo.
You might think the story ends there, but you'd be wrong.
Jake, Emma, and I head off to find their father in the livestock show barn. Jake spots his daddy, goes running up to him, and proudly introduces Nemo. While Darin was obviously thinking of several smart aleck things to say, he wisely thought better of that idea and kept his mouth shut. He knows I have too much ammo with which to return fire.
We say goodbye to Daddy, and I tell Jake that we have to go to PetSmart to get Nemo a new home and some food. I figure I'm looking at a small glass bowl and some fish food - $10 or so. The fish will probably only live for about a week, and then we can tell Jake that Nemo decided to go live in the country.
We arrive at PetSmart with Nemo, who had received an official name change to Oliver. We walk in and a very nice saleslady asked if she could help us. I said, "Yes! I need help getting a bowl and food for this fish we won at the fair." Jake proudly holds up Oliver and introduces him to the saleslady. She said, "Um, you are going to need a big tank for that fish. He'll get to be about 15 inches long. He's what we call a "pond rocket"."
Pond rocket? Seriously? Of course he is. I now have proof that carneys work for the Devil.
I asked her how cheaply she could get me out of there. The look of desperation must have been powerful as she looked at me and said, "You want to get a Betta fish." Jake, to his credit, says "I don't want a big fish. I want a fish that stays small like a baby." The saleslady had fun helping Jake choose a fish and assorted items while I wondered how I was going to explain this one to his daddy. Jake, odd child that he is, decided upon a small blue female betta - he didn't like the male ones with the big fins. Some colorful rocks and a pink plastic "flower" later, we were done.
We walked out of PetSmart with a betta fish, cheap bowl, and other essentials for about $20. Not bad, could have been much worse. I tried to trade them Oliver the Pond Rocket, but no such luck. The lady did give me a stern warning to not drop Oliver in a local lake as he would drastically alter the ecosystem. We wouldn't want that, would we?
Hot, tired, and mad at Lady Luck and carnival workers everywhere, I drove us home. We fixed up the bowl, filled it with water, and I let Jake catch and transfer the fish to her new home. I asked him what her name was, and he informed me it was Soosie. So the family has expanded to include two adults, two kids, a cat, a dog, and a fish. Welcome home, Soosie.
By the way, Oliver is probably having a grand time in the country right now.
I told Jake he could only ride three rides. Of course, being the child that negotiates for EVERYTHING, he offered two rides and one game. I accepted the deal I would later realize was more Faustian in nature than I could have predicted. Finishing his two rides, he made a bee-line for the carney game.....toss a ping pong ball in a bowl of water and win a gold fish. No way can he win that, I thought, and I won't get suckered into the "upgrade" scam for nasty, cheap stuffed animals.
Emma and I hustled to keep up. The carney saw us coming. I could see the glint in her eyes from 20 paces. "How much?" I asked. "One dollar for three, 10 for $3", she replied. I hand over $2 and tell her three balls for each kid. Emma, while enthusiastic, is less than accurate in her aim. I chased the ping pong balls down the fairway and returned to the booth, gloating secretly that my plan to NOT go home with a fish was working.
Jake warmed up for his turn. He pulled his arm back, fired it forward....and the ball bounced between the bowls and to the floor. Whew, one down. He took his second ball, started his windup, and the ball hit the bowl but careened off the water and bounced to the floor. YES! Two down. I look at my son, and I see determination cross his face. With intense concentration, he took his third and final ball and let it fly with all he was worth. It glanced off the side of a bowl, and I knew we were in the clear!
Quite pleased with myself, I look down at my two adoring children.....big mistake. As their eyes welled up, and their lips started to quiver, I steeled myself for what I knew would be the counter-maneuver. "One more, please, mama?? Please???" I tried to resist, really, I did. But I failed. And, I was feeling lucky. "Ok, but this is it...we go home after this!" I pass over two more dollars. Six ping pong balls were passed back.
Emma quickly went through her three. YES, half-way home! Jake grabs his, and the first two follow suit in to no-man's land. He takes his third ball and as if in slow-motion, I watch it sail up, up, and land gently right on top of a bowl. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Jake jumps for joy. The Devils' minion, I mean carney, laughs evilly as she hands me the bag with the fish. Jake announces to the crowd that he is naming the fish Nemo.
You might think the story ends there, but you'd be wrong.
Jake, Emma, and I head off to find their father in the livestock show barn. Jake spots his daddy, goes running up to him, and proudly introduces Nemo. While Darin was obviously thinking of several smart aleck things to say, he wisely thought better of that idea and kept his mouth shut. He knows I have too much ammo with which to return fire.
We say goodbye to Daddy, and I tell Jake that we have to go to PetSmart to get Nemo a new home and some food. I figure I'm looking at a small glass bowl and some fish food - $10 or so. The fish will probably only live for about a week, and then we can tell Jake that Nemo decided to go live in the country.
We arrive at PetSmart with Nemo, who had received an official name change to Oliver. We walk in and a very nice saleslady asked if she could help us. I said, "Yes! I need help getting a bowl and food for this fish we won at the fair." Jake proudly holds up Oliver and introduces him to the saleslady. She said, "Um, you are going to need a big tank for that fish. He'll get to be about 15 inches long. He's what we call a "pond rocket"."
Pond rocket? Seriously? Of course he is. I now have proof that carneys work for the Devil.
I asked her how cheaply she could get me out of there. The look of desperation must have been powerful as she looked at me and said, "You want to get a Betta fish." Jake, to his credit, says "I don't want a big fish. I want a fish that stays small like a baby." The saleslady had fun helping Jake choose a fish and assorted items while I wondered how I was going to explain this one to his daddy. Jake, odd child that he is, decided upon a small blue female betta - he didn't like the male ones with the big fins. Some colorful rocks and a pink plastic "flower" later, we were done.
We walked out of PetSmart with a betta fish, cheap bowl, and other essentials for about $20. Not bad, could have been much worse. I tried to trade them Oliver the Pond Rocket, but no such luck. The lady did give me a stern warning to not drop Oliver in a local lake as he would drastically alter the ecosystem. We wouldn't want that, would we?
Hot, tired, and mad at Lady Luck and carnival workers everywhere, I drove us home. We fixed up the bowl, filled it with water, and I let Jake catch and transfer the fish to her new home. I asked him what her name was, and he informed me it was Soosie. So the family has expanded to include two adults, two kids, a cat, a dog, and a fish. Welcome home, Soosie.
Been there, done that. Successfully killed a fish, iguana, lizard and crab AFTER all supplies and food items had been purchased! UGH.
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